Am I crazy? I must be crazy.

What's going on here? A couple of months ago I got an email from a journal with referee comments on a paper I submitted attached. Having other things to do at the time I left the email there, confident I could go back and retrieve the attachments. I look for it today and it's not there! I say to myself, ok self, maybe I deleted it accidentally and it's in my deleted files folder. It's not there either! Now there are over 6000 files in my deleted files folder, including every penis enlargement offer and Nigerian bank swindle email I've gotten since about 2005. I have not been going around deleting files from this folder. But where's the one message that I want? Is it in an archive folder somewhere? No, not there. It is gone, totally gone. What in the hell happened to it? And believe it or not, this exact same thing happened to me last year. Is IT going around deleting large files from my account periodically? Do I have another personality locked inside me that does not want me to advance professionally? What?